Thursday, April 16, 2015

CS Update

The hearing has been scheduled next month.  I internally did the math, and there’s a chance he may save $100.  There is also a chance it could go up $100, simply because of the new child support guideline formula.

The thing is, even after the new CS order is entered next month, let’s assume it will go into effect on June 1st.  Guess who starts kindergarten at the end of July, which would significantly change childcare costs and child support?

So we’re doing this hearing…for one month, maybe two months worth of payments?  Where he actually may have to pay more, but there’s a chance he could save $100.  Seriously? 

Now, I do not like to think that I have narcissistic tendencies—or any inclination where I think the world revolves around me.  But after talking with one my closest friends, one who is an attorney, this all seems like some weird unhealthy focus to F*(% with me.  Because otherwise, this is a colossal waste of time.  To which I say:  For F*(%’s sake, move on!!  It’s almost four years after separation, please move the F#C% on!!!!!!  Sorry for the swearing.  Seriously venting.

Or, maybe it’s not about me at all.  Maybe this is just his weird measure to have some kind of control.  Or a little of both—needling me and adding more stress to the world, along with trying to wrest some control.

Oh wait, I have to stop myself, AGAIN.  There is no “why” with him.  Exie is Exie, it’s just how it is.  Stop trying to reason with or understand the reason of the Crazy.  It’s not my job to understand or reason with him.  I’m no longer  part of the solution.  Old patterns die hard.


On the bright side, my inlaws are in town visiting, and the girls couldn’t be more thrilled.  They rode their bikes with grandpa, introduced them to the joy of bubbles and playing with our puppy, enjoined them to read bed time stories and tuck them in.  When they wake up, they’ve been asking, “Are Grandma and Grandpa here?” (unfortunately, not at 5:45am, since they are staying in a vacation condo, lol).

Makes my heart swoon.  DD1 asked to get pedicures with grandma and to go shopping for a training bra (gasp!!) so we are hoping to have a girls day, while hubby and his dad go off and do some guys type of thing.  Let the three day week end commence, starting tomorrow!  Yippee!!  I’m excited to take the girls to visit at the condo-tel, replete with water slides and swimming pools galore!

So I do feel blessed, despite the drama behind the scenes.  Concentrating on the good and love and hugs isn't so hard when you're surrounded by happy girls and a loving family. 


  1. I know the feeling. Like they've found a knife to twist...saw you flinch. Wish I could say it will get better...but it's been eight years for still happens. Glad the girls had a good week though. And take a breath. It will be over before you know it.

    1. Thanks so much for your understanding, Liv. It really helps! Even though I wish neither of us were going through this--it's comforting to know there's someone out there who completely understands. <3